Recognizing your core value starts with self-awareness!!! I have worked with many women to help them find relief from chronic pain. Most of these women are married and raising children while working outside the home. After many sessions and establishing a close rapport, it became apparent to me, the commonality amongst my female patients. Interesting enough, their personal symptoms of physical pain was a surface reflection of a greater challenge that lay deeper within…their sense of self or should I say, ?denial of self?.

Women play a critical, central role in the home, usually the primary caregivers and the home makers. It is so easy for women to get caught up in doing things to ?keep the peace? and to keep the activities of daily living moving along as smooth as possible. ?Status quo seems like the way to go.? Having a change of heart, bringing up ideas or new ways of thinking about what we want to do or how we want to feel can bring with it a period of unrest, resistance, confusion, and tension in the home. In our minds, we can create and feel a sense of uncertainty and insecurity when it comes to challenging the stability of our relationships and our family life. If we bring new ideas about what we want that is different to the original expectation of the relationship, we fear and risk confrontation with a spouse or a loved one, misunderstandings, turbulence, or possibly losing a partner. We also fear and risk being vulnerable, being laughed at, ridiculed or put down.

How can women minimize the fear and begin to talk about their innermost feelings and heartfelt desires with their partner after being complacent and ?comfortable? for many years in the relationship? After all, couldn?t this be an opportunity to enrich a relationship and open up lines of communication? Perhaps not, women so often keep quiet just to keep their marriage together, keep the peace or to keep from ?rocking the boat.? Meanwhile, when we are not talking or voicing our true interests and desires, we are choosing to live with the inner turbulence, inner tug-o-war, inner chatter and recurrent ?calling? on our heart?s desires. Is that kind of life preferably better than to take the risk and finally speak truthfully about what matters most to us?

At some point, we recognize that we want to be heard and want to have a voice in our own destiny. We desire more, something different but our desire could possibly ruffle the current ways we live; ways and behaviors that we enabled and reinforced throughout the relationship. Whatever we can do to keep the peace seems to take precedence over self-actualization, self-recognition, and self-expression … for this ?self-less? behavior is perceived as a way to lessen disagreements, possible upsets and lessen the threat of ending the security of a relationship. Yet, ladies, we are not at peace in our own heart. We are quicker to say we are tired and frustrated than inspired and desire to do something different, to grow, to dream, and to change.

Some women choose to remain with their hopes and dreams quietly inside; they choose the passive, seemingly ?controlled? path. Physiological symptoms may accompany this decision for silence… symptoms like chronic headaches, chronic fatigue, depression, high blood pressure, pain, etc., these are expressed as a result of internal pressure and turmoil from denial of ?true self.? We must seek and work to find our own core value and self-worth. Our perceptions and belief systems have been learned through conscious and subconscious programming from our earliest influences. Our cells are filled with a life-time of emotions and stored energy that feeds these emotions. The reality is we can help ourselves to release what does not serve us, change our self-perceptions, and change unwanted internal programs to find healing, clarity and direction in our lives…

The basics for self-nurturing starts with our ability to love, acknowledge, forgive, appreciate, and have compassion for our ?self? and our ?being?. It is the Spirit of Faith, Love, and Courage that fuels us. These Divine energies have the inherent ability to penetrate deeply into our core and impact our personal perception; they affect our outlook from our belief system and affect our internal view of who we are and what we have to offer our own lives and offer to the world. Daily embracing of these soothing, healing spiritual energies help to invigorate, energize, revitalize and renew us so that we are better able to listen to our own voice and recognize our core value.

We need the challenge on a daily basis to make better and better. We must speak and practice with positive, loving, strengthening of the language when we talk to ourselves and if we are with others. We need to provide healthy sources of food to feed a champion body. We need to resist, slips subtly into the remuneration, which tension and breath holding pattern.
Quick ‘softening’ exercise: Take a deep breath, let it out… Ahhh!
… And then softened his tongue (as youre going to drool, but there is no flow of saliva), softening the chin, reduce your shoulders and smile …. we have to holding a loud breathing, thank each and every new day. .. admit that our life experiences, including those that we bring is that we did not face to face, they have a lesson in adversity. Once the lessons learned, we can raise a little smart, a little stronger, and can be a little more.